So here we are halfway through a chilly Rocktober, and I can't believe I just used the term Rocktober. Then again, the kind of idiot I am should surprise no one at this point.
Things are going to be a little busy this week, as quite a few CDs are being dropped, and we've got some more concerts coming up to boot. But before we get to any of the music news of the week, as usual, it's storytime, so everyone grab a comfy seat and I'll get started.
Is everybody in? Is everybody in?
The ABC12 Listening Room is many things, including an excellent way to induce a coma. It's pretty stupid at times, but it's also a way for me to talk a little more personally.
Allow me to state up front that for the second time in the record books, I'm using the blog to write a review. And the review is on a book that is now nearly 9 years old. Dumb idea on the surface? You betcha. I would never write a proper review for something so old. It's not news anymore.
That said, the blog affords me the opportunity to review the book in a behind-the-scenes way in which I can clue you in on a happy accident this past weekend which found me stumbling upon what I consider a spectacular read.
I was in Flint Township Saturday at Barnes & Noble on Miller Road, doing my part to shift the nation's economy back into first gear by spending hard-earned moolah on music. I had just picked up a Dave Matthews DVD, "The Central Park Concert," from 2003. And it's a fantastic DVD.
(I also bought Alice In Chains' latest, and it's eerily awesome.)
On my way out of the store, I noticed a peculiar book cover in one of the racks near the front end of the showroom. It featured a photo of a cow that had been doctored to appear as though it was donning the famous bat-wing makeup of Kiss' Gene Simmons over its left eye.
"What the hell is this?" I found myself thinking.
I walked up to the shelf, picked up the book and stared down at the title: "Fargo Rock City: A Heavy Metal Odyssey in Rural North Dakota."
I thought it was kind of a weird title, and I had no idea who the author was. Chuck Klosterman. Name didn't mean much to me and I nearly put the book back down.
And then it happened.
I flipped the book over and saw Klosterman's picture and a brief bio. Didn't know any of his other work, but I instantly knew his face. And I knew I would be plopping down whatever cash was required to bring "Fargo Rock City" home.
You see, the bespectacled Klosterman and his bushy red hair have appeared several times on VH-1 talking about metal, but that's not really the key here. What's key is that Klosterman coined my all-time favorite way to describe Kiss, and I hate him for it.
(Just kidding, Klosterman.)
My new best buddy Chuck once said, "Kiss never wanted to be the Beatles; Kiss wanted to be Coca-Cola." It's a line that burned itself into my psyche permanently that day, and I think it's perfect. And so is Klosterman's book.
Well, close.
It's funny that I found this tome when I did, especially because last week, as loyal readers know, we were talking about my Seventh Son band days and my Seventh Son "mirror" on guitar, Sean Jablonski, who is currently shopping a TV script around Hollywood that's all about '80s rock on the Sunset Strip.
Holy coincidence, Batman, because "Fargo Rock City" is basically Klosterman's personal valentine to the overindulgence and ridiculousness of glam metal and hard rock of the '80s and early '90s. And I'm personally recommending it to anyone who lived during that era or anyone who just plain loves music.
I'll let the sales pitch on the book's backside explain: "Empirically proving that -- no matter where you are -- the kids wanna rock, this is Chuck Klosterman's classic memoir of growing up as a shameless metalhead in Wyndmere, North Dakota.
"With a voice like Ace Frehley's guitar, Klosterman hacks his way through hair-band history, beginning with that fateful day in 1983 when his older brother brought home Motley Crue's 'Shout at the Devil.'"
That's "Fargo" in a nutshell. But reading the book proves to be a much richer experience. Klosterman lovingly chronicles his trials and errors in his quest to become a rock critic, all the while examining whether the spell of a genre he fell under as an awkward teen should be celebrated as art or condemned as garbage.
The truth, he finds, is that it can be viewed as both.
"Fargo Rock City" is achingly funny page after page, as Klosterman often struggles like a schizophrenic in trying to explain glam metal's relevancy. He's well-versed and offers keen insight into a time when rock got wildly stupid, but man, it rawked, and Chuck knows it.
The best thing about the book is that Klosterman pays devoted homage to all things hair, leather and lace, but he also never lets anyone off the hook. The only bands which aren't completely brusied from head to toe during his verbal slaps are -- not surprisingly -- Def Leppard and Guns N' Roses.
Whitesnake and his beloved Motley Crue, not so much.
"Whitesnake was not very cool," Klosterman writes. "This was mostly because they were fronted by the generally unappetizing David Coverdale, the male slut who replaced Ian Gillan in Deep Purple from 1973 to 1976 ...
"Coverdale was always accused of ripping off Robert Plant; Plant himself was particularly willing to rail about this similarity. Indirectly, Jimmy Page made the same comparison when he created Coverdale-Page in 1992, one of the worst experiments in rock history and assumedly just a way to goad Plant into recording 'Unledded.'"
"Fargo Rock City" is loaded with such hysterical observations, but one of the best gags of all involves what Klosterman calls the Jack Factor. It's basically a Klosterman Richter Scale that measures an album's significance. Klosterman tells you how much money you'd have to pay him to never listen to a particular hair-rock record for the rest of his days.
For example, if you pay Chuck $110, he'll never listen to Ratt's "Out of the Cellar" again. But for a bargain $66, you can get him to permanently turn off Van Halen's "1984."
To give away any more info about Klosterman's Jack Factors would rob you of the joy in reading about his old playlists, so we'll sign off on 'em here. But they alone are worth the cost of the book.
My favorite part of "Fargo" is that Klosterman, ever the talented-but-conflicted critic, offers up his phone number and says you can call him if you hate the work.
As a fellow music scribe, I think this is amazing, especially considering the copious amounts of bile that often get vomited on those of us who take pokes at bands. I may also actually see if the number works, because Klosterman's writing voice is very similar to mine and I want to know who hijacked who.
(Again, just kidding, Klosterman. You're way better than me. But as far as that phone call goes, expect it when you least expect it, dude.)
Interestingly, there are several times when ol' Chuck wonders if his labor of love will ever reach store shelves before '80s rock makes a comeback. The fact that I discovered the book now that the resurgence has happened makes it an even more interesting piece of music history for me.
Klosterman pretty much nailed it, especially when he writes in the epilogue, "When I started writing 'Fargo Rock City' in 1998, it was never my intention to change anyone's mind about the value of heavy metal ...
"Superficially, I feel as though the core premise of 'Fargo Rock City' has been totally vindicated; there has certainly been a resurgence of interest in '80s metal over the past few years.
"Actually, resurgence isn't really the right word; what mostly happened is that all the people who secretly loved metal during the 1980s are too old to worry about being cool."
Maybe that's true, or maybe '80s metal really will recieve a thick chapter in rock's history books, proving that Klosterman's exhaustive exploration into a genre that most critics dismiss as music for dummies was worth it.
Only time will tell. But in the meantime, if you're a music fan you need to read this book. I feel like a dope for being so late to the party. But I'm happy to have finally cashed in my invite.
Thanks, Klosterman. Horns up.
\m/
Now on to the week in tunes ...
On the CD horizon, Tuesday will see the release of a few new discs, including "Southern Voice," the new platter from country star Tim McGraw. My Listening Room compatriot Josh Daunt has got you covered on the review, so mosey on back here tomorrow.
Also on the country singer/songwriter front is "Natural Forces," the new album from Lyle Lovett, and Terri Clark drops "The Long Way Home."
Extreme hardcore punk and metal outfit Converge is releasing "Axe To Fall," and German aggro-industrial unit Rammstein is dropping "Liebe Ist Fur Alle Da." I don't know what that means.
On the concert front, we've got metal cartoon comedy smashing into one of stoner metal's (and all of metal's) best acts, Mastodon, when "Metalocalypse: Dethklok and Mastodon with Converge and High on Fire" hits the Filmore Detroit Wednesday, Oct. 21.
Emmylou Harris and Her Red Dirt Boys play the Fillmore Friday, Oct. 23.
Also on Friday, new goth metal act Dommin will descend on Harpo's in Detroit. You can expect reviews and some video interactive, so make sure you check in at the end of the week.
Bill Engvall and John Pinette bring a double-fisted comedy attack to the Palace of Auburn Hills Saturday, Oct. 24, and The Damned with Danko Jones are playing Saint Andrews Hall.
And finally, original "American Idol" winner and pop rock princess Kelly Clarkson will visit the Fox Theatre in Detroit this Sunday, Oct. 25. Showtime is 7:30 p.m.
Also on Sunday, Blues-rock jam band Gov't Mule plays the Royal Oak Music Theatre as part of its "By a Thread" fall tour in support of their new CD, "By A Thread, which hit stores Tuesday. Singer-songwriter Jackie Greene is opening the show.
(That's it for this week, dudes and dude-esses. Stay tuned to the Listening Room. We've got lots more in store. Until then, keep rockin'.)
The ABC12 Listening Room staff: James R. Chesna, editor-in-chief; Josh Daunt, managing editor; Eric Fletcher, chief photographer; Randy Cox, photographer; Josh Daunt, photographer; Chris Carr, photographer; Jessica Reid, contributing photographer; LeeAlan Weddel, contributing editor, writer; Shawn Light, contributing writer.
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